journaling everyday for 10 years changed me- here’s how

What 10 Years of Journaling Taught Me About Healing, Self-Love & Coming Home to Myself

The Magic of Journaling

This was the very first piece I ever published here on The Fairy & The Moon. At the time, I had no idea how many kind, reflective souls would join me on this journey. Now, with over 3,000 of you here (still wow), I wanted to reshare this love letter to journaling — the practice that’s held me through everything. I’ve also included a new offering at the end for those of you who want to begin or deepen your own practice.

Thank you for being here. Truly.

my journals

I began journaling when I was 15 years old. I was severely depressed, buried deep in the throws of substance abuse, and gut-wrenchingly heartbroken over a guy who couldn’t have cared less. I took to a journal and I wrote. But also, I collaged. and I painted. and I scribbled. I took words from magazines and pasted them. I wrote poetry. I printed out text threads with the guy I was obsessed with and saved them. Later, I wrote pros and cons lists to myself to remember how terrible he was.

Then at 16, I started a new journal. I got sober at 16, entered the world of recovery, therapy, and healing. I had a spiritual awakening. I detailed this in my 2nd journal. I wrote “self love lists” as I was learning to love and stand up for myself. I wrote theraputic maps as I had realizations of trauma buried deep within. I printed and pasted photos of special moments with my friends. I had spreads just for concepts like being an empath and my big 3 in astrology.

And since then, I have held a consistent journal for every single phase of my adolescent and early adult years. Every love story, every relapse, every heartbreak, every trip, every job, has been documented and reflected on in a journal.

Let me tell you what it has done for me.

---

journaling for 10 years consistently has taught me:

1. I have felt lost more times than I could count. And directly after a period of loss and confusion, I seem to “find myself again.”

I am always at some point in the cycle of the caterpillar, cocoon, and butterfly. There is no “finish line” there is no “perfectly healed” there is only being a dynamic part of a greater evolution. Much like the seasons, the way flowers grow, the way the sun comes out and then the moon comes out and then the sun comes out and then the moon comes out.

2. Change is the only constant we can count on. But change means life is alive and well.

3. I know absolutely nothing.

4. There is much to learn from younger versions of myself.

5. I know myself deeply and thoroughly. I know myself the way a mother does, the way someone who loves you spends time to know every inch of you. I am my own safe space. We have many conversations. We create together, we laugh, we cry. I am my own best friend.

6. Through all of the seasons of life; the relationships and people that have come and gone, no matter what, I always have myself.

7. My dreams and meditations do come true.

8. My prayers come true. Often not in the way I hoped they would, but in a way much better than I could have known to ask for.

9. It always feels so much bigger than it truly is. It always turns out okay.

10. Write until you surprise yourself.

when you enter a flow state of writing in a journal, the realizations and pearls of healing come without force, without struggle. they just appear. and there is a peace that will wash over you. journaling is a very soft journey into the great underbelly of your consciousness.

from my film “I Think I Lost Myself Again”

From my heart to yours,

Rhiana Meri

if the journey of self love and the magic of journaling is something that calls to you, i’ve made a special offering just for you. its a digital guided journal collection created to support you in your journey. something you can sit in sacred space with and feel a little less alone. there are guided journal prompts, open journal space, guided self love rituals, healing routines, and tangible practices all built to deepen your relationship with yourself.